Pieces of a Big Blue Sky

Faith is jumping into the unknown. Life is so full of unknown. I think a lot, maybe too much...about life, God, myself, just about why ________ is the way it is. This week so many things have come into question, which is a funny thing, because I hate the unknown and love it all at the same time.

My bearded friend Teddy Brown used the analogy of a jigsaw puzzle so I'm going to go with it. The only difference is, when you do a jigsaw puzzle, you start from the edges. Life doesn't work like that. It's more like finding random pieces that belong somewhere but you don't really know where. Like pieces of a big blue sky. Sometimes you try to push a piece in and it doesn't work so you keep turning it around, hoping to force it in somewhere. When I find two that fit, the satisfaction lasts for a little while. Until I realize that there are more pieces missing than put together. My mind runs in circles looking for something, anything to grab onto to fill the space, the unknown...

Two conclusions I can draw.

The cognitive dissonance, the tension, is good. I am more afraid of complacency than anything else. If you or I never questioned the status quo, never questioned the lenses with which we saw the world, we would stay very flat people. Flat like a warm can of coke. Gross.

Jesus calls himself the Light of the world. The psalmist writes, "in your light we see light." Light is truth. Seeing the world through Christ, we see things as they are. As I draw nearer to Him, things come into clearer focus. But until our hearts and minds are completely freed from the selfishness that cloud them, a lot of things won't make sense. God won't make sense. He's not supposed to. The trite answers are not satisfactory. Sometimes, even the most advanced theological, philosophical ones aren't either. And being okay with that is hard.

"For I can promise you none of this...no land of inquiry, for I bring you not to the land of questions, but of answers, and you will see the face of God." -C.S. Lewis, The Great Divorce