Beauty rests.

And I don't. Not well, anyway. Inspired and challenged by my lovely friends Ame and Lauren, I am choosing to rest well. Lately, I have found that my sabbaths have been un-restful. Instead of feeling refreshed, I get to Sunday evening and feel this sort of impending doom that is the upcoming week. And, partly because of my earlier misunderstanding of the sabbath, I feel guilty if I didn't spend the sabbath praying or reading scripture. Yet, I have been reminded that God created the sabbath FOR us, and that he wants to pour life back into us through it. Lauren challenged me to make a list of things that bring me life and just do those things, instead of worrying about how I "should" be spending my sabbath.

So here's my short list:
-blowing bubbles
-biking
-baking
-playing guitar
-reading
-being still
-writing...a letter, a song, thoughts, prayers, dreams...
-sunsets and clouds
-painting
-just 'being' with a friend
-driving
-Pride and Prejudice
-jumping on the bed
-listening to a symphony

And I've decided I want to make a specific discipline of the last one. I'm a music major, yes, but for most of my musical life I have failed to really experience music (hmm...sounds a lot like my spiritual life.) So, every weekend from here on out, I want to listen to an entire symphony...not as background music. I want to drink it in, be overwhelmed by it, process it...and experience God. and maybe I'll record my thoughts here. Yes.

Even resting is an act of faith for me. It takes trust to believe that God will do whatever He needs to do without me and that I can accomplish all I need to do in the other six days. But it's not a blind leap by any means; it's a leap into grace: grace that God provides a day for my soul to be restored, and grace to relinquish control over life.

Grace.

The sabbath is grace. I can do this. Or just...let Him.